Perm or color, not both

Dear 16-year-old me,
Stop fretting. You’ll get into that Ivy League college you’re spending your life obsessing about. So go ahead and breathe—and enjoy high school. Seriously, enjoy it. Do pay a bit more attention in pre-calculus, though.
Oh, that idea about medical school—forget it. You hate science; admit it now.
Think about other things you might like…something in
business, perhaps?
Whatever you do, be determined to make something lucrative out of your college experience when you get there. Don’t just fart around and party, because Ivy cred will only get you so far.
Eat a ton more fruits and vegetables. Cut dairy products out of your life now. Don’t double-process your hair if you want to still have a full head of it when you’re 40. Either perm or color, not both.
Call Billy and reconcile with him. Go ahead; you know his number.
Dial it. If you don’t, you will regret it for the rest of your life. He may
not be around much longer.

I love you. Relax.


Your 40-year-old self


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