You ARE pretty and smart and funny. People do like you, even though life at home with unhappy parents and so much unpleasantness would suggest otherwise. Go to a small college, and talk to people. Go out. Have fun. Attending a huge state university will prove to be overwhelming for someone as shy as you. Don’t hide. Make overcoming shyness a priority early in your adult life.
Just because a man is nice (and doesn’t hit or yell or belittle) doesn’t mean you should marry him. True, you weren’t given a lot of good information about how to have a healthy relationship. But, wait for the man who “gets” you. Who understands you and appreciates your talents. Wait for someone who likes what you like, instead of trying to like what he likes (and which isn’t true to yourself).
You can do this, Cathy. Realize that the stuff that went on at home will soon be past. Then, work at adopting a positive outlook and expect good things (you DESERVE good things), because you are going to live a long time.